I just wanted to say to any person out there who didn't see the red flags... you're not stupid. You didn't know. You gave it your all in a relationship and got burned. Maybe badly. You're stronger and wiser, NOT stupid. No you didn't deserve to be treated the way you were. You can't change him or her and it's not your responsibility to make them act like decent human beings. You're not their mom or pop and you shouldn't have to be. You're responsible for yourself only and since you're still alive reading this, I congratulate you. It means you love yourself and you now have the knowledge and experience to set boundaries and enforce your boundaries. It means you now have the bare bones to guidelines for what you expect in a good relationship. As Elsa said, "I'm never going back/the past is in the past". As it applies here, you're not going back to the same kind of guys or girls in your past. *hugs you*